Best Week Ever (NBA Playoff Edition)

Call me a fair weather fan, but because my hometown teams are mediocre at best (see Things That Make You Go Eh...) I usually get going when the going gets tough. Tonight however when KG screamed "This is for Minnesota" after winning his first ever NBA championship with the Boston Celtics, I felt, for the first time, proud to be a Timber wolf. No, this doesn't mean I will start supporting them or the Celtics when they are losing, but I must admit it softened my cynical heart. Read below to find out who, other than Minnesotans living vicariously through Kevin Garnett, is having the best week ever. 

1. Paul Pierce's Facial Hair

Winning makes people forgive and forget anything, including the apparent kitchen on Pierce's face. 

2.Vanessa Bryant 

Sure the Lakers lost but she is still winning. She's banging, her babies are beautiful and while we all know Kobe cheated, what he lacks in morality is made up by the fact that he is fluent in Italian. Like my man Mitch used to say, her life is goooood. 

3. Notre Dame

Goooo Irish! Go Irish! Beeeaaatttt Lakers! Beat La-  waaiiittt a minute... it's USC not the Lakers that embarrass our football team every season, but still California is California, and this is war. 

4. He Got Game

Jesus Shuttlesworth is officially an NBA champion and only Spike Lee had the foresight to see it. Now all that's left to figure out is what the hell he was thinking when he made Girl 6.

5. Doc Rivers 

Putting it down and holding it down for all the Ty Willinghams of the world. Word. 

I've Got a Golden Ticket!

Either retire or go to rehab but something has to happen, and I mean now. Before The Carter III dropped I promised myself to not dedicate an entire post to Lil' Weezy and all his foolishness but I can't resist. I could forgive the tattoos on the eyelids. I could. I could forgive the fact that you often refer to yourself as a martian. Although the shit is weird and indicative of drug abuse, I overlooked it. With that being said, I clearly also forgave you for being a crack head. Because I didn't feel like  you were at the point of having these cheeesseebuurggeeerrrss, I turned a blind eye. But this jump, this frolic if you will... I will not forgive. This picture reminds me of all things gleeful, specifically Corbin Bleu. As my comrade (and partial roommate) Dom put it- you are a GANGSTER RAPPER, no one should ever be able to say they have a photo of you resembling a Disney character, but damnit they do. In most cases rappers can make anything, and I mean anything look cool. But readers take a moment out of your day wherever you are and try to reenact that jump then tell me how it feels...exxaacctly. No homo. 

With help from Mali ( from Cali) and Dom, the Roommate. 

Burn After Reading

I am geeked about this movie- nuff said. 

Hawaiian Silky

Long hair, I gotsta care. Lloyd and his locks are putting women everywhere to shame and there is only one thing left to say- how often does this negro shampoo and condition? I love his hair like The Dream loves yo' girl, plus this song and video are hot. Hype Williams lives up to the hype with his one, making me wish I had stars for eyes and an ethereal booty to match. 
                              

Things That Make You Go Eh...

Randy Moss is a clown indeed, but at least he gave the Minnesota Vikings a little bit of character. He always made me proud to bleed purple and gold. Even when Moss, upon being asked how he planned to pay for a NFL fine, replied "straight cash homey" I stood by his side. I stood by his side because with him the Vikings won and well... he was at the very least interesting. Yes this response was indicative of the kind of ignorance that makes you question whether or not someone ate lead paint as a child, but everyone has their faults. Moss was a lot of things. Country? Yes. Illiterate? Maybe. Entertaining? Undeniably so. 

This Mossian nostalgia has no doubt been ignited because the current Vikings are so damn unexceptional. They aren't good. They aren't bad. They are just mediocre- stuck dead smack in the middle between winning the Super Bowl and playing for the Miami Dolphins. In light of this mediocrity I have decided to make a list of things that, unlike C & C Music Factory, do not "make you go hmm." These things instead make you go "eh"- you know, the grunt that signifies partial disinterest. Enjoy. 

1. The Minnesota Vikings

For the most part the players are mildly attractive, mildly literate and only mildly talented.

2. The Minnesota Timberwolves

Ok so maybe Minnesota isn't the best place for athletics. Although I put on for my city (on on for my city) I have to admit the T-Wolves just aren't that great.

3. Lil' Waynes The Carter III

Remember the point in the Temptations Movie when David Ruffin starts to refer to himself in the third person- that's where Weezy is in his career. Straight crazy. His lyrics on the album are aiigghhtt, but mostly the The Carter III is a lazy slur of well...aiigghhtt lyrics. 

4. Hillary Clinton 

While she lost to Obama (which rocks my world) I can't let this shadow the fact that she indeed did lose and thus is a LA-WHO-ZA-HER. I guess this doesn't necessarily make her mediocre, but you catch my drift. 

5. Amy Winehouse post racial slurs

Because racism went out of style like 40 years ago, it makes everything less cool including her music and that damn bee hive. 

Say It Loud...

Tuesday night was a lot of things. It was monumental. It was historical. It was a defining. It was redefining. Yes, as Barack Obama became the first African-American Democratic nominee for President, Tuesday night indeed proved to be all of the aforementioned. But it also proved to be something more. Something that an American president has never been. Something that the white house, by sheer definition of its name, could never be. Tuesday night was black. As Barack and Michelle Obama embraced  each other on stage at the Excel Center in St. Paul, Minnesota to announce their hard-fought victory, they practiced what I like to call a "code" interaction. That's right- they did some shit that only other black people would understand. They dapped each other up. While many may have recognized the exchange, the meaning of that dap at that moment can only be understood within a specific cultural context. I absolutely loved it.

The thing that I love even more, the thing that completely and utterly thrills me is the medias attempt to describe the gesture, calling it a "fist bump" or a "closed hand high-five." Think The 6th Sense when only the little boy could see Bruce Willis, but less morbid- only black people could see and understand the true immensity of that interaction. The dap reminded me of a speech of Obama's that I watched on television a while back. As Obama entered the auditorium, embracing fans as he made his way to the stage, someone yelled out "I LOVE YOU OBAMA!" 

What made this moment in his campaign so substantial was not the fact that he has a prince-like ability to make women scream "I LOVE YOU" and subsequently throw their panties on the stage -instead it was Barack's response which was simply "and I love you back." Now to the untrained ear, this response is nothing more than Obama's way of establishing a good rapport with his followers. For black people however, this response meant not only was Barack black, but he was black for real for real. This response meant that at some point in his life, Obama has watched Martin Lawrence's You So Crazy- one of the most popular comedic stand ups in black culture.  That's right, for once there is an African-American running for public office that is not trying to pass- and it tickles me so. As I wait intently, patiently for November 2008, Obama has surely got me invoking the Godfather of soul- singing off key, but with pride "SAY IT LOUD, IM BLACK AND I'M PROUD!"